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Being good at Failing

Ideally no one would really want to fail at anything they try hard to accomplish. But, it does happen so we do need to be able to accept it as a possibility. Failure happens all the time in sports especially when you are an amature trying to make it to the professional level. Like what goes on every august in the NFL. Elite athletes have opportunities taken away from them daily, and none of it has to do with an injury or even their ability to play in games.

Outside of Sports these situations happen a lot less and in the work life I’d say it’s even more rare. The 90 day probationary period in a new job? maybe, but not so much.

I would say it would be more like an entry level employee busting their hump to become noticed as an asset to the company, being told they were getting a promotion, and prove they deserve the position. Then day 1 when you are all set up in your new office, new notes, new suit, new attitude, and ready to work; your boss comes in and says that “you are fired from the company, but it is not based off your performance, when we promoted you we were looking at other options, found someone else, and they are starting immediately…pack your things please”

Tell me how much that would suck…I’d be pretty bummed.

Would you be able to handle that situation with grace, or would you throw a temper tantrum?

Learning from Failure

Everyone fails at something sometime in their life. I feel that those who tend to be successful understand that failure does not mean it is time to quit or quit so easily. Yes, we can sulk for a little bit after a failed attempt’ but the faster you are able to get back on your feet and in the right direction the faster you can assess what you need to adjust in order to achieve your goals, whatever they may be. Maybe the reason you were unsuccessful was a simple mistake you made and can easily fix it, maybe it was a humbling experience that you need to address some of your weaker areas. A general rule that I have is to always ask why. If for example if you did not get a job that your truly thought you were qualified for, how are you going to know why you did not get it if you do not ask. It could be something concrete like a lack of experience or knowledge about something, or it could be subjective, and that they just felt a better connection personally with the other candidate. The concrete you can focus on adjusting how you approach a topic. The Subjective feedback means you qualified 100%, but we literally just chose this person on reasons not related to professional qualifications.

For example: I once applied for a job working in corporate wellness which means working in a gym facility within the building of another company. They were looking for someone to bring awareness of the benefits of exercise and effects on wellness,work related output, but not for athletic performance. I answered one question saying something like “ I enjoy learning from athletics, and have enjoyed working with athletes in past experiences.” I didn’t get the job, and when I asked why the hiring manager told me that while I was qualified she didn’t think I would be happy working with a primarily non athletic based population”. Even though I would be happy doing that, I can see how she might have gotten the impression I only wanted to work with athletes instead of apply the knowledge I have gained from athletics to THE EVERYDAY ATHLETES in the workplace. An unfortunate failure on my part, but one that I am able to grow from. I never would have known the solution was so simple if I did not ask.

BEING “GOOD” AT EVERYTHING

Today we try shielding the younger generations from failure as much as possible by giving out trophies for everything, limiting blow out victories, talented player involvement in games, substitution rules, etc. I personally think that failing to win, or losing produces a better learning, and growth experience than winning or being praised for everything. Being praised, and winning all the time in my mind can lead to poor work ethic, laziness, lack of character, senses of privilege, and arrogance in some cases. Maybe knowing, and understanding you’re not that good at something can lead to the unveiling of another skill you didn’t know you had. For example, maybe if I was told that my Square 5'9" frame,25% shooting percentage, 4% 3pt. percent, no left hand dribbling skill was an amazing NBA worthy future superstar I never would have embraced my love for drawing and the Arts. On the other hand if I really loved basketball despite my lack of skills would it be best to over exaggerate my abilities with praise, or would it be better to be honest with me and encourage I strive to get better?

If you truly want to succeed than understanding your strengths as well as your weaknesses is a necessary quality. It maybe hard to take one at first but…you’ll Get over it.

In the end failure should be only another force to drive you to reach your goals instead of inhibiting them all together.

Originally published at fitletes.com

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